IF HEALTHY eating HASN'T BEEN GIVING YOU ERECT NIPPLES, IT WILL NOW
4 MIN READ
"DIETS SUCK PENIS"
AND OTHER WORDS TO LIVE BY FROM SHANNON KELLY WHITE
Shannon Kelly White is not "a tossbag-food-saint". She rates the recipes in her new cookbook: Healthy Food You'll Actually F**king Eat, using a scale of nipple erections, and her insta posts are hilarious. Tick, tick, tick.
Besides making healthy food fun – and funny – she's also a nurse, mum, student (studying a Masters in Nutrition), and author.
We talked to Shannon about juggling life and surviving, how she inadvertently started a body positive movement, and what the term "wellness" means to her.
"I WASN'T SCARED OR EMBARRASSED
TO BE NEW OR UNKNOWLEDGEABLE
– I WAS HAVING A FUCKING GO"
Other than nerdburger academic pursuits, I've never really excelled at anything. Taking on a shitload and surviving has shown me that I have grit. It's also shown me there are lots of good people out there who will pump up your tyres and offer support – especially women. I really bloody love that.
It's been a challenge, though. Juggling work and motherhood has meant I've had to learn how to avoid losing my shit. There have been days I haven't nailed that, but I'm getting better at [it].
My greatest daily need is cuddles with my two little boys. They're two and five and are still in that wonderful smoochy phase. Laying on the couch with one or both of them in my arms is the best and most relaxing part of my day.
It's how every day starts and winds down, unless it's my bi-yearly turn to go out binge-drinking. In that case, the day winds down with me declaring my love for everyone and vomiting on my shoes.
[On Instagram] I take the piss out of myself relentlessly, and talk about my body (even my pet haemorrhoid) frankly and without shame.
Would I love to be smoking hot? Of course I fucking would! But it's not essential to happiness or self-acceptance. We are so much more than our rigs and their wrapping.
Fostering body-positivity hasn't really been intentional. I just tell silly stories from my day-to-day life where the undercurrent is always to invest your fucks in things that are worthy.
I can't help but feel a wee bit miffed when health bloggers overcomplicate "wellness". For some it's almost a competitive sport to see how much time and money they can spend on their bodies or what ridiculous liquid they can lavage up their bottoms. Most of us don't have the resources or energy for that shit.
That overzealous perfection is daunting. It can make people feel like they're not good enough because they sometimes eat donuts or have a bottom that jiggles when smacked. Mine jiggles like a terrified Chihuahua, but that doesn't define my health. To me, being well means having a balanced, functional body, enjoying your life, and nurturing and growing a mind that isn't fucked.
I love getting snuggled up on the couch with my Beyonce-esque don't-fuck-with-me goddess of an old cat, a hot cup of tea, and a ripper novel to read. Or hitting the beach with my boys, catching up for a cheeky drink with friends, or having a really great shit. I find all of those options highly refreshing.
Shannon's Kitchen: Healthy Food You'll Actually F**king Eat is available online and in bookshops around Australia.
Interviewed by Dee Behan